Season 2, Episode 7: Show it, say it, ask it, or touch it?

Tania Huddart: In a group class, not everyone wants to be touched. And not everyone wants to say so in front of a room full of people. So here's a simple idea. A card. Yes on one side. No on the other. They put it next to their mat, with their answer facing up. Nobody has to speak up. And when you walk round the room, you already know.

Host: Welcome to Build Confidence and Purpose with Pilates. I'm here with Tania Huddart: Pilates teacher, teacher trainer and author of Pilates & Purpose. Both voices you'll hear are made with AI. Every word Tania says is her own, and she's approved each one.

Last episode was about why not everyone gets your cue. Today we open the whole toolkit. Show it, say it, ask it, or touch it?

Tania, welcome back.

Tania Huddart: Thank you. And the answer is, all four. You don't pick one. You pick the right one for this moment, with this person.

Host: Most new teachers have a favourite, though.

Tania Huddart: They do. And it's usually showing. That's what we know. Most of us came to teaching because we could do the exercises. So we demonstrate. We show everything. And when you're nervous, showing feels safe. Your body knows what to do, even when your words don't. And for a while, that works.

Host: Why only for a while?

Tania Huddart: Because your body will complain. If you teach many hours a day and demonstrate every movement, you'll get injured. I know a bit about that. I came to Pilates because teaching was injuring me. And when you can't show an exercise any more, you need other tools.

But showing is still a wonderful tool. It gives people a picture of the movement. A model to follow. The point of showing is understanding. And sometimes people watch you, and still don't quite do it. That's not a problem. That's where the other tools come in. A bit of puzzling it out is good for people, too. Curiosity is what makes them want to learn.

The trick is how you show it. Show it first without talking. Just the movement. When you talk while you show, people try to watch and listen at the same time, and they do neither very well. Without words, they can take in the shape of it. Then give them one cue to focus on as they start.

Most new teachers talk while they show. I did too. It feels like you're helping. You're really just adding noise.

Host: And when do you show it?

Tania Huddart: More often than you'd think. When you first introduce an exercise. Again in the next class, as a reminder. And again at the end of the exercise, as a last reminder.

And when you watch them do it, move around. Look from different angles. Things you can't see from the front are obvious from the side. Then check they've understood. If the exercise is complicated, break it into parts. Teach each piece, let them slow down, then put it back together.

Host: Does that change online?

Tania Huddart: You'll probably need to show more online. You can't walk round the room. Set your mat on a diagonal to the camera so they can see the shape, and make sure you've got good light. Wear plain, solid colours, and avoid black or charcoal grey. Dark clothes disappear into the mat, and they can't see what you're doing. Busy patterns are hard on the eyes on a screen, too. And smile while you teach. It changes your voice. And you'll lean on the other tools more, which is no bad thing.

Host: Then there's saying it. Explaining.

Tania Huddart: Explaining is your chance to talk and their chance to listen. So keep it short. Say what the main focus is, and get them moving. Start by putting them in position. "Lie on your side, facing the windows. Lengthen your legs away from the top of your head. Stack your hips on top of each other." Simple, clear, one thing after another. An explanation should always lead to doing. People learn by moving, not by listening to you describe moving.

Don't explain while you demonstrate. Let the two work together, one after the other. Keep it brief. Explain one thing at a time. Then let them practise it before you move on to the next thing.

And you can help the words along. With an image. With touch. With a few clear cue words. Then ask a question to check they've understood.

And use plain language. Medical-sounding words make people feel lost. Your clients can learn new ideas over time. But give yourself time to explain them. Don't expect anyone to remember everything from one class. Say it again next week, and add a little more.

Host: Do you plan what you're going to say?

Tania Huddart: It helps so much. Before class, think about a few things. Are you introducing anything new? How will you introduce it? What words will help people connect with it? When will you show, and when will you explain? What's the one thing you want them to focus on? And what are the key points they mustn't miss?

That sounds like a lot. But if you do it for a few weeks, it becomes a habit. And it gives you more moving time in every class, because you're not searching for words.

Host: Asking is the one I think a lot of new teachers skip.

Tania Huddart: It is. And it's the one that does the most for people outside the studio. When you ask a good question, people start thinking for themselves. They start to understand how their own body responds. And they take ownership of what they find.

Host: When is the right time to ask?

Tania Huddart: I wish I could give you a formula. There isn't one. It's an art. You catch them at the right moment, when their attention is with you.

It can take time for people to get comfortable with being asked. Some clients have only ever been told what to do. So make it safe. When someone answers, welcome it, even if it's vague or not quite there. If they feel supported, they'll answer next time.

Host: Any tips for asking better questions?

Tania Huddart: Rehearse them. Write them down. Say them out loud to yourself before class. It feels a bit odd, but it works.

Think about what the person already knows, and ask from there. Have a mix of quick questions and bigger ones. And don't expect people to be mind readers. If there are lots of possible answers, don't wait for the one in your head.

Try asking after you've shown something. "What are the important things to remember in this one?" You'll get a few different answers. Then you can talk about them together. And you find out what they took in, which is often not what you thought you said.

Online, keep it simple. Ask them to mute while you teach. When you need an answer, unmute them. For a yes or no, a thumbs up or thumbs down is plenty.

If you're working with someone for the first time, your first questions are for you. They tell you what they already know. Then you know where to start.

And if a question doesn't land, say it a different way. That's not failing. That's teaching.

Host: And if they just don't have an answer in the moment?

Tania Huddart: That's fine. Not every answer comes in class. Some people need to go away and think about it. Let them practise in their own time, and bring their questions back to you next week. Thinking it over at home is learning too. It might be the most useful kind, because nobody's watching.

Host: And then touch. That's the one people are most nervous about.

Tania Huddart: Touch is the one I take most care with. Touch is a conversation between you and your client. And either of you can say no. Always. That goes for you too.

If you do use touch, be clear about why. Hesitant touch makes people uncomfortable, and it gets in the way of their learning. Your touch needs to be gentle but firm. And it shouldn't hurt. When something hurts, the muscles tighten up to protect themselves. Which is the opposite of what you want. Pain can tell you both something useful, though. It shows you where the body is sensitive.

Planning touch is complex. A lot of it is intuition, and that grows over time. Be open to what your clients tell you, with their words and with their bodies.

Host: How do you know if your touch is working?

Tania Huddart: Ask. From time to time, ask your client how your touch feels to them. They're the expert on that. They know far more about how they experience your hands than you do. So listen to what they tell you, and adjust. Your touch gets better one conversation at a time.

And there's a lovely way to make touch work better. Before you touch, bring your attention to your own hands. Then bring it to the part of their body you're touching. That tiny pause gives them time to bring their attention there too. Now you're both focused on the same spot.

Host: What kind of touch, practically?

Tania Huddart: A flat palm or flat fingers is usually best. Firm, direct pressure over a bigger area. It feels safe, and it doesn't tickle. Tickling makes muscles tighten and confuses the body.

You can brush lightly over an area to wake up awareness there. Or put your palm flat on a body part and guide it gently in the direction you want it to move. That's good for small, subtle movements.

And if someone's not ready for hands-on help yet, you can use a spiky ball or a roller. The contact is less direct. It can feel more comfortable while you build trust.

Host: And in a group?

Tania Huddart: That's where the consent cards come in. Yes on one side, no on the other. People don't have to put their hand up and say, "Please don't touch me." They just turn the card.

You can also ask people to use their own hands. Touch your ribs. Tap the top of your shoulders. That helps them feel where things are, and it works when you can't touch at all, like online. And if you're comfortable with it, you can let a client touch you, so they can feel the movement they're aiming for.

But if either of you isn't comfortable with touch, choose another tool. There are always other tools. When you do use touch, be professional, be deliberate, and be confident.

Host: Do you ever use all four on one exercise?

Tania Huddart: All the time. Show it without talking. Give them one cue. Let them try it. Explain the main focus in a sentence, maybe with an image. Bring their attention to a spot with their own hand, or yours, if their card says yes. Then ask what they noticed. Each tool picks up what the last one missed. That's the toolkit working together.

Host: So, three things to take home?

Tania Huddart: One. Show it first without talking. Then give one cue.

Two. Keep your explanations short, and ask more questions. Questions help people own what they find.

Three. Touch is a conversation, and either of you can say no. In a group, let a card do the asking.

Host: And the question to sit with?

Tania Huddart: Pick one exercise you'll teach this week. When will you show it? What will you say? And what will you ask?

Host: If you'd like to try the consent cards, they're free at taniahuddart.com. Print them out. Yes on one side, no on the other, so clients can say whether they'd like hands-on help without having to speak up.

Next episode, we take the cue one step further. How do I make a cue stick?

Tania, last word?

Tania Huddart: Just this. You've got more tools than you think. You don't need to be good at all of them tomorrow. Pick one you don't use much, and try it this week. Then see what your clients tell you.